The First Red Flag

The subconscious truth your child isn’t telling you

By: Ariana Nguyen

There’s no better feeling than returning to an empty home after dropping your child off at college, but your job as a mother doesn’t end there. At the end of every semester, your child’s new appearance will tell you everything they won’t, and it’s as simple as asking, “When was the last time you got a haircut?”

As a mother of one, I’m highly qualified to offer advice for any scenario. 

If your child comes home with a brand new haircut, know it’s a perfectly natural consequence all birds experience when leaving the nest. Without you around, your child will feel emboldened to make their own decisions, but one day, they’ll realize you’ve always had their best interests in mind. Let them know this fact in order to steer them in the right direction.

But if your child has the same haircut, they must have visited a salon—hair grows three inches per fortnight after all! Every hairstylist isn’t created equal, and it’s likely they cut off a quarter of an inch too much, or worse, too little. Your child is attempting to live independently by making their own hair appointments, but they’re struggling. Offering unsolicited advice will remind them that you’re always there to help. 

And if there’s no haircut at all? Their growing hair is a reflection of their growing worries! Inquire extensively about their academics, social life, and the state of their dorm. Don’t be afraid to get critical! Every little detail is a sign of something bigger!

Now that you understand what these first impressions can offer, this technique can be used to analyze other aspects of your child’s appearance. Was your child wearing too few layers this winter break? There’s a reason!