Finding Your Peace Among Pixels

A guide for having a positive online experience

By: Srihita Raju

At the beginning of every single week, I tell myself that I will do my best not to be on my phone as much as I was last week. And every Sunday, I check my screen time, think about how much time I spent on my computer, and realize that I have to try again next week. A few months ago, I came to the realization that the issue isn’t how much time I’m spending on my computer, but how I’m spending my time online. If I’m mindlessly scrolling through the Instagram explore page, then I’m going to be on my phone for hours, clicking through every one of my “you’ve reached your time limit” notifications. Often, that mindless scrolling makes me feel terrible about myself. I think that I’m not “enough.” Not pretty enough, not skinny enough, not rich enough, not productive enough. But, if I spend my time on places online that help me feel happy and engaged, then it is far easier for me to get what I need from it, and move on with my day. Finding positive Internet spaces looks different for everyone, but here are some pointers to help you get started.

First, start to pay attention to your online habits. When you’re waiting for your teacher to start a Zoom call, do you automatically start scrolling through TikTok? Is what you’re watching funny, or can you just not stop scrolling? It is a common feeling, but a sad one, when you realize that the content you’ve been staring at for the past hour isn’t amusing to you, but rather just something to tune out to.

Next, try to be intentional when you pick up your phone or laptop. In my experience, it matters less that you are staring at a screen, and more about what is on that screen. If you want to be on Instagram for a bit, would you rather look through the hundreds of 5-minute crafts on your explore page or would you rather check out what your friends have posted on your home page? Start to realize when you are paying attention and happy and when you are just trying to give yourself something to look at.

Now comes what I think is the most freeing part, the purge. Every time you see a video in your YouTube subscription box from a channel you haven’t watched in years, every time you see a post from an influencer that makes you feel bad about yourself, and every time you find yourself clicking through a story from someone you don’t know, start to click “unfollow.” Widdle down your feeds to the posts and content you know you look forward to seeing. Another, more difficult part of this step is to delete the apps and stop checking the platforms you don’t even really like. Twitter stresses you out? You don’t have to be there. Facebook feels like a burden? You don’t have to carry the weight. You never watch the beauty guru you used to love in middle school? It’s ok to let go. They probably won’t notice. If you are seeing something that isn’t making you happy or adding to your day in a meaningful way, even in a small way, then it is probably best to just forget about it.

Lastly, the fun part, finding your happy place online. The simplest way to go about this is just to start looking into content you’re interested in. If you really like a certain TV show, find its fan communities on Tumblr. If you like painting, start watching different artists on Youtube. There is no right or wrong way to do this step, but finding places on the Internet that are about hobbies or things that make people happy, not about view counts or drama, are a really great way to find a positive, engaging Internet oasis for you to escape to. And although you certainly don’t have to, interacting with those communities can immerse you even more. Of course it is important to be careful online, but if you feel inclined to, talking to people on Discord servers or asking questions during your favorite author’s livestream or posting your submissions for fan art contests are all ways for you to get more enjoyment out of your time online. Positive communities are something we all strive to find in our real lives, and finding them online as well can make the Internet, which often seems cold, feel warm and important.

It may not seem like it’ll make a big difference in your life before you do it, but once you purge your homepages from the content that doesn’t do much for you and replace it with content made by creators and backed by people who share similar interests/values to you, you’ll start to notice how much lighter your brain feels. The Internet is an amazing way to find things to do that’ll help you unwind, but our brains weren’t made to take in this much information all at once. Make sure that what you are taking in, you actually want.