Types of People at the Gym

A brief survey of some idiosyncrasies observed by the author at the rec center

By: Khilav Majmudar

At the time of writing this piece, I did not have a complete understanding of the term “gym shark.” Upon Googling it, I have come to know that it is a fitness apparel company. It might be common knowledge, but then I am one who happens to be out of several loops at any given time. Many a time have I seen references to the phrase without any mention of the company behind it. Now, a question arises in my mind: Did the phrase become popular before the company, or was it the other way around? If anyone can conclusively provide me with an answer, I would be mildly pleased. This is just one of the few oddities that has tickled me at the gym. 

Whenever I see a “GymSHARK” or a “BEAST” in the gym, I cower into my squat rack, hoping that if I appear to mind my own business, they won’t come for me. Just as loan sharks devour borrowers, gym sharks consume every equipment and exercise within their reach. After three sets of triceps pushdowns, the shark heads for the dumbbell rack and pumps out some bicep curls. It seems to be arm day, and so the next step is to do some dumbbell raises for the shoulders. They might tackle a machine or two towards the end of their session to “kill it in the gym” for the day.

For some groups of gym goers, the weight room seems to be the only place where their daily sports discussion can take place. While I am not averse to hearing diverse opinions on Tom Brady’s current form, it can be a little irksome when it’s coming from a trio of dudes who have colonized a bench press set up for ages. On the flip side, there are a few lifters who are in and out of the gym in half an hour flat, after doing a maximum of two different exercises. This does not imply that they didn’t work hard, though. Some training plans do happen to be short and intense.

Then there are the folk who are thumb-twiddling on their mobile phones between sets. I am one of them. Hardly anyone isn’t. The said activity is performed especially when one is without companions. We can’t stay away from our phones for even three-quarters of an hour. Knowing this, I have a suggestion. For one week every year, the rec center should make it compulsory to deposit our phones at the entrance to certain rooms. Then, grad students from the Department of Psychiatry should observe the public inside these rooms. I strongly believe that this would make for an interesting case study. It may happen that no gym goer will enter these specified spaces for that one week for fear of losing their beloved’s company for the duration of a workout. Who knows? On the same topic, I have seen a very small number of people taking meticulous notes between sets using implements of a bygone age—pen and paper! An unfamiliar sight indeed.

If there is a species that needs to be singled out for criticism, it is the inexperienced non-clippers. Members of this clique will load up the barbell with weight but will not clip it on. Now, this is fine if the lifter knows the proper technique of performing the movement. But this comes with time and experience. On more than one occasion, I have seen people lifting a weighted bar overhead and then losing balance, causing a twenty-five-pound plate to begin an unimpeded descent from the heavens. Fortunately, no harm to life or limb was caused in those situations. I like to think that people learn from their mistakes, and I hope that the offenders in question did too. I think these errors stem from the general lack of awareness a person has of their physical abilities. The human body is a marvelous machine and can perform great feats of strength and athleticism, but it must be trained to do so. There is no getting around that fact.

Altogether, the gym is a fun place to go, not only because of the exercise one will benefit from, but also because it provides the opportunity to see a host of people engrossed in doing their own thing. There is a surprising amount of variety in the ways people conduct themselves when they aren’t overly cautious of their surroundings. And observing this tiny sliver of humanity has given me many moments of joy and amusement.