The Death of the Girl Boss
Why did young people let girl boss idealism die?
By Srihita Raju
Growing up, all I wanted was to be perceived as a girl boss. Although I didn’t yet know that the term “girl boss” existed, I had the images drilled into my mind: an office with a view of a bustling downtown street; pantsuits; an intimidating title; an even more intimidating paycheck; an assistant running behind me, reminding me about my next meeting as I walk out of an interview, in which I had been asked, “Just how do you do it all?”
The term often refers to prominent, wealthy women in high-ranking positions. Now, this definition doesn’t sound so negative. Many girls grow up being taught that they should be quiet and meek, not intimidating or powerful. So of course, seeing girl bosses as a young girl is beyond exciting—it's inspiring.
If so many girls, at one point, dreamed of this lifestyle, what happened? Where did the love for girl bosses go?
At first, the death of the girl boss might sound anti-feminist, but in reality, it is the opposite. The first reason for shifting away from girl bosses comes from the fact that the girl boss culture is mostly perpetuated by women who have been shown to not support other women themselves. In many girl boss movies, the woman is rude to everyone around her. It is known as “Queen Bee Syndrome”: women are rewarded for adopting masculine traits and praised for being the only women in the room, which results in treating other women poorly. For example, Sophia Amoruso, the founder of the apparel brand Nasty Gal, was viewed as so much of a girl boss that it was the title of her autobiography. However, Nasty Gal had to file for bankruptcy after employees complained that the company had a toxic work environment and that women had been fired when they became pregnant, a shocking discovery for women who had looked up to Sophia Amoruso as a feminist role model. Another example of a girl boss-inspired company that didn’t live up to its brand was The Wing, a women’s-only co-working space. The Wing kept luxury items in stock for their members, had beautiful work spaces, and held members-only events. Not only did The Wing have a pricey membership fee, meaning that only some women could afford to use the space, but employees also reported being treated poorly by members.
Apart from the real-life examples, the desire to be a girl boss feels a little outdated. For example, not all women deal with the same struggles. Many of the messages around #girlboss have been about sexism, which only addresses one aspect of the discrimination that some women face. The girl boss idea tends to disregard the very real discrimination that women of color or women in the LGBT+ community face in the workplace, which white cis-het women don’t face. It also perpetuates the idea that for women, the only way to be seen as serious or successful is by having a high-paying job in corporate America. For some people, success might mean money or recognition or raising a family, for some it is all three, and for some it is just to be happy. There are so many different ways for people to find and define their own success, so there is no reason to stick to outdated markers of success.
The girl boss ideal died because women realized that they do not need to be wealthy or have high-ranking positions to deserve respect. Also, getting to the top, past all of the abusive men who kept you down, means nothing if you are going to behave the same way when you’re in power. How can someone claim to be a girl boss when they slam the door in other women’s faces?